Sunday, November 29, 2009

Sometimes I just need to rant. [If you know me in real life, don't read this.]

Disclaimer: Sorry for the swearing.  I was mad. And there aren't any other words that fit what I mean.

I am so mad right now.

I feel like everything is fucking my fault in this family and I'm sick of it. Honestly, I'm just sick of my family. I am SOOOO ready to just be out of this stupid little town in the god damned suburbs and be at college in the city.  I hate it.  I'm always the one that gets made fun of, teased, the butt of every frickin' joke, and when I tried to retaliate I get yelled at.  Really? It's like everyone else's feelings are considered except my own.  Who cares if my feelings are hurt? It's just fun to make fun of me!!

And everything we do is planned around weather or not I do my chores well enough. I want to hang out with Yearin who's visiting from college? I have to clean my room otherwise I can't. The entire family wants to decorate for christmas? Ok, but Faith has to sweep first.  So we can't decorate for christmas because I didn't sweep or clean the fucking bathroom.

UGH!!! I am so fucking sick of my family!!! I'll just go back to russia next summer, because Lena is obviously the perfect daughter, and I'm not good enough.  My parents would obviously have Lena as their daughter instead of me.

Yea, dad actually said I could go to Russia instead of Lena because Lena's mom did such a good job of raising her.  And it was all because I want my ears pierced again and Lena doesn't like piercings.

Speaking of which, Why the HELL did Miley Cyrus get her nose pierced?


Huckdoll said...

Take it from someone a lot older, but someone who was just as furious with her parents when she was your age...

This will pass and you'll grow and every single day become more independent. Before you know it, the world will be yours for the taking, and home ... your family ... your parents?You'll need them, I promise that (except you won't have to sweep anymore! huzzah!).

I know this doesn't help in the moment, but I believe that as shitty as things feel right now, you should find a moment to give gratitude for being loved and having family. You are very much loved, I'm sure of it. Parents of teens just have a really strange way of showing it sometimes, mine sure did.


M+ said...

"Yea, dad actually said I could go to Russia instead of Lena because Lena's mom did such a good job of raising her."

In other words, your dad is admitting that he and your mother have been lousy parents?
I'm just kidding, but if you ever feel like using that as ammunition against them, make sure your bags are already packed...

I gotta tell ya, as a former teen and now as the parent of a teen, it's never as simple as it may seem on the surface. Trust that they do have your best interests at heart.

Besides, it will all be over soon enough. Either you'll break the bonds when you leave for college. Or one of you will end up killing the other...